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I haven't dreamed about Colorado or Apple in months. Just now, it was both, together all mixed up. The genius bar in the middle of the store like a Joann's cutting table, but otherwise all Apple-y. My co-workers were there, recognizable and talking. On my lunch break I had to go visit someone I'd known during school -- now she had two pre-teen daughters living in her house.

The dream had the distinct feeling of returning to somewhere left behind long ago. This wasn't a normal workday -- I was coming back for a one-time fill-in of some kind. And I wasn't normally in Colorado either -- somehow I was just visiting.

Lately, I've been thinking about all the lives that I've had. It's felt for a while now like people of my generation reincarnate over and over during their normal lifespan. I don't know anyone who has a career, something they've done for decades. I know very few people who are using what they went to college for.

In my life I've been a religious studies graduate student, I've cut fabric, I've worked in an animal hospital, I've run help desks, I've fixed computers, I've programmed, I've cut bagels, I've given telephone surveys. Some are similar seeming on the outside, but culturally they couldn't be more different.

The life we had in Colorado seems like a dream now -- except Pat and I both remember it together. It was a part of our lives that no one else here shared, except for some visits from family. It was completely different from here and now.

Likewise pre-Colorado was a different life. All that Rutgers jazz, just doesn't seem real anymore.

I feel like I'm walking around with the weight of all these other people inside me, the people I've been. I feel heavy. The dream last night put me two lives back at the same time.

LiveJournal runs on rubberbands and plastic-jug vodka. Cross-posted from http://sleepymaggie.dreamwidth.org/450420.html.

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jennicakyte
Nov. 2nd, 2011 03:34 pm (UTC)
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